casy_dee

Connor Has Had Enough
Rating: T
Summary: Connor decides he's not in the mood to be Abby's doormat after the day he's had. He's homeless, Jenny died then quit, and he was almost turned into a Connor-sicle. Enough is enough.
Chapter: 1-2/5

Chapter 1: Chapter 1
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A/N: This takes place after what I affectionately call the Connor-sicle episode in season 3, episode 5. The premise is: What if instead of Lester walking in and finding out that Connor has been living at the ARC (since Abby evicted him for 'a few days' so her brother could stay with her), Abby finds out.

So I love Connor and Abby. I just had to figure out another Primeval fic for them. Thanks for all the suggestions folks! I have another one percolating, too.

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Connor Has Had Enough

Abby had just gotten back to her flat at the end of another long day when she realized that she had forgotten her mobile back at the ARC. It had been a rough day, so she figured that she was likely due the luxury of a lapse in memory. Unfortunately her job made her phone absolutely necessary, or else she would have just left it. She retrieved her mobile and stopped into Sarah's office on the way out. Her light had been on, and Abby was curious why the Egyptologist was still working. Ordinarily the only person that stayed so late was Jenny, well, she did before she quit. Another team member down. At this rate, she and Connor were next.

"Sarah, what are you still doing here?" Abby asked.

"Oh! I didn't realize it had gotten so late, actually. I was just working on the artifact; I lost track of time. I guess it will still be here tomorrow. What are you doing here?" Sarah asked.

"Forgot my mobile. Rough day, wasn't it?" Abby smiled, trying to make conversation.

She wasn't anxious to go home and deal with her baby brother. She loved him, but he was trying her patience with his complete lack of consideration for her home. He was even messier than Connor, and unlike Connor, he wasn't the least bit apologetic, and he didn't confine his mess to his room. And Connor was never dirty like Jack…leaving food bowls out and refusing to lift a finger to help wash up or even pick up his own mess.

"Yes, it was. Shame about Jenny leaving. But I imagine after hearing what happened to Connor earlier, and then her actually dying for a moment there…well, it's enough to make most people question how safe it is to work here, I suppose." Sarah rambled on as she gathered her things to go.

"Connor? What do you mean?" Abby asked.

"He got trapped in the lab. One of those diictodons of his was in there and he went in to fetch him. He spilled some saline and the fungus started reproducing itself again. He's the one that figured out that fire didn't work, and that we could freeze the fungus to death. Of course, we had to lower the temp enough to kill it off while he was still in there. He was afraid it would spread through the ARC…he refused to leave. He nearly froze to death. We weren't sure he was going to make it." Sarah related.

"I thought you knew?" She continued, noting Abby's horrified expression.

"No. He didn't say a word." Abby answered.

"I think he's still here, if you want to ask him about it. He's been spending an awful lot of time here. You know, come to think of it…he's here when I get here in the morning and he's always still here when I leave." Sarah noted.

Abby smiled distractedly and nodded, more shaken by the thought of Connor almost dying than she wanted to admit.

"Well, see you tomorrow then." Sarah said, turning to leave.

Abby wondered why Connor hadn't told her about his close brush with death; if anything, she figured he'd try to score a sympathy hug at the least. And why was he spending so much time at work? She headed to Connor's lab, determined to get some answers out of him. Ever since he had moved out, he'd been avoiding her when they weren't actually out responding to an anomaly. At first, she hadn't even realized it because she had been avoiding him out of guilt. She didn't like it…the thought that he didn't want to see her. He'd asked her today if she missed him yet…she did. She just didn't know how to deal with it. It stirred all sorts of uncomfortable thoughts in her…thoughts she'd been repressing for a reason.

Abby walked past the still burnt out remains of Cutter's lab. She cast her eyes to the room to her left, spying movement, and then Connor's dark shock of hair. She peeked in at him around the edge of the door frame. He was telling the diictodons to have sweet dreams? Why? And it looked like he was getting ready to turn in himself. He had laid out a makeshift cot and blanket, and even more telling…he was standing there in only his grey shirt, his boxers and socks. Aqua blue socks, she noted with amusement. A carry-all and a shaving kit were stacked on top of the dog crate…he had been living there. Why hadn't he told her?

He hadn't said a word when she'd asked him if he could stay somewhere else. He had just smiled and assured her that it would be no problem. As always, he had just gone along with what she asked of him, never complaining, never arguing. Why would he do that? Did he do it all for her? Just because she asked? Why didn't he tell her he had nowhere else to go?

"Connor?" Abby called out as she entered the room.

He stiffened and spun around, a ceramic mug in his hand.

"Are you living here?" She asked.

He swallowed, there was no sense in trying to pretend otherwise. "Yes."

He swept up his red jeans off of the floor and pulled them on, and then slipped on his boots. He didn't want to deal with Abby right now and her moods; her running hot and cold for him. He'd almost died today; Jenny had died today, even though they had managed to bring her back. It had left him thinking about how short life was. He had watched too many people he was close to die already; when would it be his turn? Not long, knowing his luck. Abby was just another reminder of how much life he had missed out on because he was afraid to do something about it.

He'd leave…go somewhere. Get away from her.

"Connor…I thought you were staying at a mate's?" She asked.

He shrugged. "Fresh out, apparently."

Abby thought about it. He never hung out with anyone but her…not for a long time. She'd accepted his assurances that he'd find a place to stay because she had wanted to believe it. If she would have bothered to think about it, she would have realized that he didn't have any other friends anymore. It's not like working at the ARC left them a lot of free time.

He turned his back to her to face the metal counter he had fashioned into a sort of makeshift kitchen. He didn't want to see her pity. She must be thinking 'poor, pathetic Connor. How sad he is…no friends, no girlfriends except for Caroline, and she'd been paid to date him.'

"Look…you can stay on the couch until you find somewhere." Abby offered.

Connor slammed down the mug on the counter. Abby flinched in surprise.

"It's just for a few days, eh? So I take it that you didn't ever intend for me to come back?" He asked, his voice tight and strained.

"Jack is my brother. I told you, he needed a place to stay." She explained defensively.

She didn't mean to take that tone with him, but she was edgy and uncertain of how she should deal with her feelings for Connor; it seemed to manifest itself as her lashing out at him. She always screwed everything up, every relationship she'd ever tried to make work. She didn't know how to act, and it scared her.

"You really don't give a damn about me, do you?" He asked bitterly.

Abby paused, taken aback. Connor didn't talk to her like this. What had gotten into him?

"What?" She replied, at a loss for words.

Connor threw the cup against the wall, shattering it. Abby jumped and took a step backwards. He spun to face her, seething. She recoiled from the look on his face. His eyes were hard and furious, his jaw clenched in a hard line, his hands balled into fists.

"What? Now you're afraid of me? Of pathetic, harmless Connor?" He growled.

He stalked towards her, and Abby's breath caught in her throat. He was scaring her. Logically she knew she could probably wipe the floor with him…but this Connor seemed to be a different person. It was as if he was possessed.

He stopped inches away from her, stared down at her intensely. His eyes pitiless and cold, so unlike Connor's warm chocolate kind ones. The veins in his neck stood out, he was visibly trembling as adrenaline coursed through him.

"What is wrong with you?" She managed to get out.

"What's wrong with me?" He repeated angrily.

He'd show her what was wrong with him. Just once, he would do what the hell he wanted to do, and the consequences be damned.

Abby gasped as he wrapped his arms around her, pinning her arms to her sides. He crushed her mouth against his, hard and passionate and needy. She froze, and then melted into it, unable to force her brain to think about what she was doing logically. She just knew it was good, electric and passionate and…this was Connor? Connor setting her body on fire? She wanted to dig her fingers into his hair, pull him closer, but he held her immobile against him. She felt his thick erection pressing against her…she didn't know he had this raw emotion inside of him. She never knew. How could she not know he felt like this?

He let go of her abruptly and pushed her away in the same motion. He exhaled in a shaky shuddering breath and turned away from her.

"I'm finding my own place. I'll get the rest of my things tomorrow." He said flatly.

He grabbed his coat from the floor and walked out, leaving Abby without a backwards glance.

Abby stood there for a few long moments, shell-shocked, her hand pressed to her tingling lips. Her heart hammered in her chest. She had to go after him.

TBC

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A/N: First off…no, I'm not killing anyone off. They were just being pessimistic.

I love me some angry Connor. We hardly ever get to see it. He's just so easygoing most of the time. After the day he's had, and sleeping at work, and everything else that happened that day…well, it was a good trigger.

O' course, he lost it when Stephen and Cutter stopped looking for Abby in the 'Mer' episode…mmm hot. And even that little flash of temper at Danny when Danny was still a cop and he chased them out of the house. I know. I have issues.

I haven't determined a concrete length for this one, other than to say it won't end up novel length like my Alice/Hatter fic. I have a couple of chapters planned out so far, but it will probably be determined by my muse and by reader interest. Soooo, if you like this one (or hate it), please do review. Reviews are love and they feed my muse.

Chapter 2: Chapter 2
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A/N: Folks I really hope you like this…it was some tough writing. And all of you that reviewed and encouraged me, thanks so much. You made Connor clamor for me to hurry up and get back to him!

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Chapter 2

One of the nice things about working in the ARC was that any time Connor needed to get somewhere he could usually get one of the soldiers to take him where he needed to go. He wasn't entirely sure he was supposed to be taking the liberty to do so, but no one had denied him as of yet. He was doubly glad of that tonight when he had an urgent need to get away from the ARC as quickly as possible. He couldn't even allow himself to think right now…he just had to stay angry and get away.

He got dropped off at a pub; he didn't usually drink much, but he thought tonight called for more than a cold Corona. He sat at the bar and ordered a pint and downed it, and then another. He was working on his third and his head was getting a pleasant buzz before he allowed himself to stop repeating all of the paleontological genus' he could remember over and over in his mind.

As soon as he stopped the litany, the realization of what he had said and done to Abby came crashing down on him. He had probably just destroyed any chance he'd ever had with her…as if he'd ever stood a chance. He laughed bitterly and took another deep swig. She'd been pretty clear on that. The 'Oh god no, as if!' that she had said to Caroline when she'd asked if they were together came immediately to mind.

The offended and disgusted way that she corrected anyone that even suggested that he could be her boyfriend…the way she'd smirked when he told her women found him attractive...it all spelled out her utter disregard for him. She didn't even care enough about him to spare his feelings. And despite evidence to the contrary, women did find him attractive…but when he opened his mouth he usually lost their interest. That's why he'd been so excited about Caroline.

She had pretended to be interested in the same things he was…and she acted like she truly liked him for who he was. He could have had girlfriends, if he had the time (which he didn't) and the inclination (he'd been obsessed with Abby). He just didn't want to pretend to be someone he wasn't… he would not even do that for Abby.

He was tired of it. Tired of all of it. Tired of taking every backhanded comment with a smile and a shrug. Tired of being the one that was easy to push around…because he never pushed back. All he had ever gotten from it was a reputation for being an easy target. He had enough of the condescension and abuse. Abby heaped more upon him than anyone else; but he loved her…so he let it go. He always thought it was better to be her friend than nothing…now he had likely lost that. He ordered another pint.

All the thoughts in his head began to slow and go fuzzy as he saw the bottom of the glass. He lifted his hand for another. He never drank like this; he was afraid he'd get a call and he'd be unable to respond. He acknowledged the chance that this was a distinct possibility, but usually they had at least a few days between each anomaly. As poorly as things had gone for him today, he hoped that the averages would hold as he continued his search for oblivion in the bottom of a glass.

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Danny answered his mobile warily. An incoming call from the ARC couldn't be a good thing, and this was the second one he'd received tonight. The first call had been from Abby. It seemed that she had lost Connor somewhere and she was wondering if he had seen him. She said his mobile was ringing directly to his voicemail. He assured her that he was sure Connor would go home at some point, but that he would let her know if he heard from him.

This call was from one of the security crew at the ARC. He had spotted one Connor Temple getting right pissed at the pub that many of the ARC employees chose to frequent. He seemed to think that Connor was likely in imminent danger of passing out or getting arrested, or both. The man related that he had told Connor he'd take him home, but Connor had told him to get the hell away from him…he wasn't going anywhere. Danny had to ask him again if he had the name right, that just didn't sound like Connor.

The security man was going to stay and look after him while he was there, but he thought that it was a good idea if Danny came to get him. Danny sighed and said he'd be right there, and to keep Connor out of trouble meanwhile. He supposed this is what he got for accepting the job as team leader…babysitting duty.

Connor stiffened in anger as felt a hand on his shoulder…again. He'd already told that bloke he wasn't leaving. He was going to sit here and drink himself until he was proper sloshed, and he wasn't there yet. He turned to face the man with a snarl and blinked confusedly when he realized that it was Danny standing there.

"What're you doin' here?" Connor slurred.

"I'm keeping your sad arse out of trouble. I'm taking you home." Danny replied.

"No!" Connor argued, and held on to the bar in a white knuckled grip.

"Look…you are coming with me if I have to carry you out of here." Danny countered.

"Abby kicked me out. I can't go home…don't have one." Connor disclosed resentfully.

It suddenly made a lot of sense why Connor would be sitting here all alone drinking himself into a stupor. It was as clear as day that Connor adored Abby; he'd seen that straight away. He had seen the way that Connor looked at her (and the way she sometimes looked at him), and at first he had assumed that they were together. When he asked Abby about it though, she had acted offended at the mere suggestion. Privately he thought that Abby was a stubborn fool not to admit that she felt the same way about him.

"She called me looking for you. Let me take you home, and then you two can sort this out." Danny cajoled.

"No. Just take me to the ARC." Connor insisted.

He stood up, almost fell down and staggered towards the door. Danny put his arm around the slight man and helped him out the door. First things first, he'd get him out of the pub, and then he'd see about finding him somewhere to stay for the night. He didn't fancy taking him to his place. He liked Connor well enough, and he wouldn't hesitate if it was just him in the house, but he lived with his mother. She hadn't been the same since his brother had disappeared. He tried to keep from upsetting her, and the strangest things could set her off. Connor certainly qualified as a 'strangest thing.' He got Connor buckled in and secured inside his car and started the engine.

"You can't stay in the ARC Connor, be sensible. Do you have somewhere to stay?" He asked kindly.

"I got angry. I got angry at Abby. I yelled at her and…I...lost my temper." Connor confessed, avoiding the question.

He paused, covered his face with his hands. His began to shake as he relived the moment…the shocked and scared expression on Abby's face when he had stalked towards her. He never wanted…never imagined… that Abby could be scared of him. And he'd been so angry, and he couldn't hold it in this time. Couldn't shake it off with a shrug and a smile. He had just…lost it.

He had hurt Abby! And he had…he'd…assaulted her! Pain constricted his chest, moved up into his throat, choking him. He fought back tears, the alcohol loosening his ability to keep reign on his emotions. This is also why he didn't drink to excess…he had a tendency to share more than he liked to. There were a lot of things that Connor would rather not talk about.

Danny let him get it out of his system. He got the feeling that Connor kept more hidden behind his easy smile than people realized, but he could hardly imagine Connor yelling at anyone. All the technicians that worked in his department loved him; he never got impatient or upset with them. He always took the time to explain anything they had questions on, without complaint. The ARC was more dependent on Connor than anyone realized, at least that's the impression that Danny was left with.

"I think I might have hurt her." Connor whispered.

At this admission, Danny stiffened. He grabbed Connor by the shoulder and shook him.

"What did you do?" He growled.

Connor swallowed and met Danny's angry gaze. He deserved it. If Danny decided to haul back and punch him he would just shut up and take it. He had no right to do that to her. None, he berated himself.

But it felt good…and I enjoyed it, he thought. He felt like a monster. The worst sort of monster, because he had threatened someone that was his friend…someone that had trusted him.

"I yelled at her...and then I kissed her." He admitted.

Danny's anger dissolved and he gave a relieved laugh. He should have realized that Connor couldn't ever do anything violent, especially to Abby. He'd seen too much as a copper though, and he'd seen domestic violence cases from a lot less likely suspects than Connor Temple. It was one of the things he just couldn't tolerate. He was just glad that Connor was being overly dramatic, or else they would have had a problem.

"No! You don't understand…it's not funny at all! I grabbed her! I held her arms down, and I kissed her. I didn't give her a choice!" He cried.

Danny stared at him, considering. Abby could likely have gotten free if she wanted to, she was a tough one. He quirked his eyebrow.

"Did she kiss you back?" Danny asked.

Connor just blinked at him stupidly, but he saw the gears begin to turn. He leaned back in the seat and closed his eyes and tried to force his drunken synapses to connect. He replayed the scene in his head.

Connor nodded, finally.

She had…and enthusiastically. What did that mean? Connor wondered. His head began to spin again, and he regretted drinking quite so much. Especially regretted drinking so much on an empty stomach.

"If she kissed you back, I'm not thinking you did any lasting damage." Danny reassured him.

Connor's jaw tightened again. He breathed out in a huff. She could have stopped him. He had kissed her…she should have said something after at least. He was left with the uneasy conclusion that she didn't want to like him, even if she had kissed him back. He just wasn't good enough for her…or she would have said something. She'd called Danny, but not him. If she wanted to see him, she would have called him. Well, at least he had finally done something. The rest would be up to her. He was tired of the games. Life was too short.

Connor sighed. "Just take me back to the ARC, I'll find somewhere else more permanent tomorrow. Truth is I have been staying there for a while. Ever since Abby's brother came to stay with her. Just don't tell Lester, okay?"

Danny nodded finally and began to drive towards the ARC. "Tomorrow ask Lester for a day off, find a new place to stay. We'll call if we need you."

Connor nodded. "Thanks…and don't mention this to Abby, yeah?"

Danny shook his head. "I wouldn't dream of it, but you are going to have to get this sorted. I recommend being sober for it."

Connor gave a humorless laugh. "I think this is the first time I have had more than one drink in the last three years. It won't happen again…I know it's irresponsible of me, and I'm sorry."

He managed the apology without slurring too many of his words, but he figured it would have probably come off better if he hadn't sounded so inebriated.

"Later Connor, we'll talk about this later." Danny promised.

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Connor woke up feeling like a truck had run him over, backed up, and then ran over him again. Unfortunately, he wasn't a blackout drunk…he remembered every bit of the night before. He changed and ran some cold water over his face and brushed his teeth…tried to look a little less rough. He took a deep breath and headed towards Lester's office. He would be in this early…he always was. Connor fervently hoped Abby was NOT early this morning. She had been earlier ever since she didn't have to wait on him in the morning. He didn't want to face her.

The ARC was only sparsely populated as early as it was, but people would begin arriving within the next few minutes. Connor hurried down the corridor, eager to speak to Lester before he had too much of an audience. Lester was in his office alone wearing his typical perturbed expression as he read a stack of paperwork. Connor had never seen a man who came across as so perpetually bored, irritated, and condescending as Lester did. He had to work pretty hard at being so aggravated all the time. Connor had seen how much Lester got paid…he should be smiling. He stopped in front of Lester's desk and waited. After a few moments of waiting for Lester to acknowledge him he cleared his throat.

"What is it?" Lester asked, irritated at the interruption.

"I need to take today off. I have some personal things to take care of." Connor stated.

"No." Lester replied without even bothering to look up.

Connor ground his teeth. This was exactly the sort of thing he was tired of dealing with. Had it been Sarah, Becker, Danny or even Abby…then Lester would have said yes. At the very least, he would have explained why not. He kept his composure. Maybe Lester had a good reason for it.

"Why not?" He asked softly.

"What sort of operation do you think this is? You don't get extra days off, and you are lucky to get any time off at all." Lester snapped.

Connor's mouth thinned to a grim line. "You are telling me no?"

Lester sighed theatrically and finally looked up at Connor. "I'm feeling generous. Take an hour to do what you have to do, but I expect you to stay an hour later tonight."

No more. Not from Abby. Not from Lester. Not from anyone. He was fed up. He clenched his fists and took a step forward. He leaned over the desk to look Lester in the eye.

"I almost died yesterday. Jenny almost died. Cutter and Stephen are dead…" He began quietly.

"Every day we put our lives on the line for this job, without complaint and without question. If I say I need a day off…" He paused for effect, making sure that Lester was giving him his full attention.

"I NEED A FUCKING DAY OFF!" He screamed.

Lester blinked, taken aback.

"Keep your mobile with you at all times. You are expected to report back here immediately if you are needed." Lester stipulated.

Connor swallowed and straightened. He gave one brisk nod.

"Of course." He answered and turned to go before his courage could desert him.

He ignored the openmouthed stares as he made his way back to his lab to collect his things. He knew there would likely be a price to pay for his outburst later…but he was finding it strangely liberating. Besides…he had got the day off he had asked for. Now he just had to find a place, a cheap place for him and the diictadons to stay.

TBC

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A/N: You know… Connor never tries to change for Abby. As much as he adores her, he doesn't. I really like that about him.

So, I think this chapter was so difficult because I want Connor to act in character, and he is pretty difficult to rile. I hope that I have succeeded in making it believable. Everyone has a breaking point, so he is at it…and I think Connor is way stronger than he gives himself credit for. Please do review?

So I think maybe I have this figured out (the cut part) All 5 chapters are to big for one entry though so I'll post as seperate journal entries.